Advice from Mama Raven’s desk

Q: My girlfriend thinks vegans are weird and self-righteous, but I was planning on going vegan. Do you think she’ll handle this well? If she doesn’t what should I do?

A: Being a vegan is a big commitment and I applaud you for that. It’s going to take some serious willpower to start vegan life and continue it. A lot of people have the preconceived notions about vegans being self-righteous and weird, but not all of them are. It’s not the group that makes a person a certain way it’s their personality.

Your girlfriend definitely has some preconceived notions about vegans that may come from an interaction she had with them, but it’s not right for her to carry that negative image of vegans onto all vegans. I don’t know how long the two of you have been together but you obviously liked each other enough to get together in the first place.

If she accepts who you are now I wouldn’t see a reason for her not to accept a vegan version of you.  If your personality changes after you become a vegan then I understand her not handling you being a vegan. If you stay true to who you are then there shouldn’t be a problem.

If she doesn’t handle you being vegan from the start then there is a problem. You aren’t doing anything dangerous or illegal if you go vegan therefore it makes no sense for her to no support you.

She might be afraid of you turning into a self-righteous weirdo. You have to reassure her that she doesn’t have to worry about that happening. That also means you have to be open if she tells you that you’re changing in a negative way.

If she doesn’t support you going vegan for selfish reasons like not wanting a vegan boyfriend or just not supporting you then that’s a deeper problem. If you’re in a relationship with someone that doesn’t support you then I would say reevaluate the relationship and make sure it’s what you want.

If being vegan is important to you then she should respect you enough to give you some support. If it comes down to you choosing to have a girlfriend and being vegan then I would choose vegan. I hope it won’t come to that but if it does I’m sure you can find someone else that would support you and love Oreo based desserts.

Good luck,

Mama Raven