The Independent Student Newspaper of St. John's University

The Torch

The Independent Student Newspaper of St. John's University

The Torch

The Independent Student Newspaper of St. John's University

The Torch

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Dialogue on marriage

Scott Kreppien

is an aspiring Catholic priest and sophomore at St. John’s.

Marriage is the intimate union of two people in God. The husband and wife are making a commitment to love, honor, and cherish each other for the rest of their lives. It is a spiritual union between two people in which they share in each other’s love and the presence of God within themselves, with each other, and their lives are forever joined.

Marriage is a sacrament, an act in which God shares himself and his perfection with us through the minister between God and man, the Son of God and second person of God, Jesus Christ. Both spouses who are being married already posses Christ within them, and through the Holy Spirit the presence of Christ inside of themselves is shared with one another in their commitment to love each other permanently, and unconditionally. God is Love, and in marriage the human love that two people share is united with the love of God between them so that their human love is no longer human, but Divine. In marriage two people are not being married, but really three: the husband, the wife, and God.

Sex is seen as being proper only inside marriage; this is one of the rules that the Church recognizes, but that people don’t particularly like. Many people will say sex feels great, and it’s fun, why would God not want me to have fun? What we need to realize when thinking of sex, is that we are less than God, and God loves us and wants to be united with us eternally. Sex is wonderful, but it is also incredibly special. Love is the spiritual sharing of yourself with someone else, and sex, the physical sharing of yourself with someone else. Sex and love should be united, since God wants to be with us in all things, and especially since it is an act that is a physical representation of two persons sharing a perfect love (God) between them. We are told that sex should be within marriage because having sex is like saying “I do” on the altar, just without words. Having sex outside of marriage would be the same as committing yourself in marriage without meaning it or realizing what you’re getting into.

This comparison between marriage and sex can be understood in reverse also. Marriage is spiritual sex. You are committing yourself in God’s love to another person who is doing the same to you. And just like there is with sex, there is an incredible amount of pleasure involved. Our spiritual nature, however, is greater than our physical one, and therefore the spiritual pleasure from marriage is inconceivably greater than the physical pleasure of sex, although this pleasure will only be fully felt when we are completely in touch with ourselves spiritually through being united with God after death.

Adam Sornchai

is an aspiring Lutheran minister and freshman at St. John’s.

Why is marriage important? What is the difference between two people who are in love and married and those who are just in love? There is a big difference. However, in this day and age, and perhaps even in our generation, we may not see how big a difference it is.

In its simplest form, marriage is a bond, a vow taken between two people in love and is also a vow before God that they will love, honor and obey until death do them part. The critics say that today in America we do not take those vows seriously. Statistics do show that one in two marriages ends in divorce. With a 50 percent divorce rate, maybe there is reason to question “American values.” But, I am not going to judge those who split up and say that they did wrong, that they missed the point when I was not in their position. We don’t know why each couple who divorces split up and what they went through and felt. I am just an 18-year-old freshman who is single. So, it would be real easy for me to preach that once you’re married, you are supposed to stay married.

The union of marriage is the oneness of two people, maybe the closest form of love similar to the love that God has Himself. When you are married, your names are the same, the wedding ring a circle, a symbol of eternity. Yes, a marriage is supposed to be forever. It is a pledge for that union between two people until one passes on. I think the problem with marriage today may be that we look for perfection in our spouses and when it doesn’t happen, we end it. Or, the reason people aren’t getting married is because they haven’t found that perfect guy or girl yet. Well, no marriage is perfect. Just ask anyone who is married. If you are really looking for that perfect person, good luck finding him or her because they aren’t out there. One person can never fulfill all your needs.

Would you really want to marry someone who is perfect? Anyone can love perfection, but when you love someone else or when someone else loves you, not only for your strengths but your faults, I think that is the best and most rewarding and fulfilling relationship you could ever be in. It’s also the ultimate bond of sharing, highs and lows. Maybe that’s why it’s meant to be forever, its unconditional love. Like I said, it’s special to love imperfection. Perhaps that’s why God loves us so much.

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