Jill’s Beginner’s guide to college hookups: good luck

College hookups are probably the hardest thing to define. In general, there are some rules that you should follow when traversing the difficult roads of college parties, dating and committed relationships.

Number 1: Don’t do anything you don’t want to do. 1A: Don’t do anything because you think you should.

This is the number one rule for a reason. College is about finding and defining yourself. Part of that is doing what you want to do regardless of what someone else may be trying to pressure you to do. There is no deadline for milestones. It doesn’t matter if you’ve never had your first kiss, don’t feel like you need to catch up to whatever “everyone else is doing,” which leads me to the next rule.

Number 2: Don’t believe everything you hear.

People often exaggerate details of their encounters with the opposite sex, especially to people they just met. Just because your roommate is explaining her steamy hookup from the night before in explicit detail doesn’t mean it is all true. Many people view college as a way to reinvent themselves, including creating a “cool” reputation.

Number 3: Be safe.

These are the standard precautions: use protection, always be aware, don’t go out alone or with people you don’t know, don’t put yourself in dangerous situations, everything in moderation and trust your gut.  Having fun doesn’t necessarily mean being reckless.

Number 4: Run it by your friends

Your friends will be a great sounding board for anything that does make you a little nervous. They see the things you might
be blind to and they, if they’re good friends, will always tell you the truth.

Number 5: Know what you’re getting into. Know what you want.

One of the biggest issues that happen to college relationships is a lack of communication. Be sure that you’re both on the same page with the relationship and that you’re both comfortable with what the future may or may not hold. Don’t think that you’re going to be able to change him and don’t think that he’s going to suddenly fall in love with you when the only time you hear from him is after midnight on weekend nights.

Number 6: Be open-minded.

Sometimes that weird guy you met at the Honors softball game ends up being the perfect guy for you. Don’t write anyone off because they don’t fit your “ideal partner” that you imagined in your head. The real guys are so much better.

Number 7: You’re only young once.

Now is the time to make mistakes: date the wrong guy, enjoy the single life, go out with friends, learn from your mistakes, try new things, meet tons of people – you never know who you’ll see again later in life

Number 8: Enjoy yourself.

College is way shorter than it seems. Before you know it, you’ll be in your senior year thinking of all the memories that led you there. Don’t be afraid to have fun now – the real world is just around the corner.